Borrowing Our Children

Now that the school year has ended, and the students are back for the summer programming it's back to the grind!  I spent much time this week thinking about the year, but also thinking about the upcoming year.  The year certainly had its ups and its downs.  We celebrated academic and recovery benchmarks, and we also had heavy hearts when students made choices we may not have thought best.

In my teaching career I have become accustomed to seeing students come and go when they make the decision to leave school due to frustrations and lack of feeling success.  It never gets easier.  It is always difficult when I hear a student utter the words, "I'm signing out of school-I'm done with this."  When they have reached this point, it is not a simple task to get them to change their minds.  They have reached a point in which they are in shut down mode.  In these times, I have learned to do my best to counsel the student, show my support, offer them options to help them overcome school, and enlist their families to help.  In these times I have also learned that when these students reach the age of making their own decisions there is sometimes no way of stopping them and we must let go.  In letting go, the student will face the reality of their decision, and only then will they think on the consequence.  I hope that when they think on the decision they will then make a choice to rectify the first one. 

Luckily, I have seen instances where a student leaves school, and then returns a month or more down the line realizing the value in their high school diploma.  I have seen students return with determination, and a new found motivation after thinking through what they decided.  I continue to hope that some of the students lost this year among the pressures that surround them will return to us the same way.  As adults we always want what is best for our children, and in my case my students.  I have come to terms with the fact that I can inspire, guide, and connect with my students in hopes of having them see the value in their education.  I can never make decisions for them.  Part of their growing up is the need to make their own decisions and feel the consequences. 

A great colleague that I admire once said, "We don't own our children, we borrow them."  I had to think about this for awhile.  While I am not a parent, I put it in the perspective of teaching.  She was right, I don't own and control my students.  I have them for a period of time in which I can hope to teach and reach them before sending them out into the world that awaits them.  I think about what this colleague said often, and it has shaped me into the teacher I have become and will continue to be.  I have to make the time I have count with my students, and hope that they will make the right choices to benefit their lives.  I have to let them grow and experience life.  Most importantly, I have to be there for them always.